Kill the Songwriter.

"Eyes on the clock 'till my writer's block is dead."

If there is one scene in movie history that exhibits the realistic frustrations that is writer's block, it's that one.  Just replace Peter with Ram, and a piano with an acoustic guitar, and you've got yourself a recipe for a five-star disaster-piece in the self-loathing department (that's dash-tastic).  However, my song went a little something like this...



Yep.  Song of the Year-worthy.  Eat it fun.  Sitting at home and staring at an alarm clock didn't help either.   The creative juices weren't flowing naturally and it seemed my band was running on a hamster wheel listening to RATT on repeat. (Count the bucket if you get the reference).  Playing the same set of songs was definitely wearing me down.  Then, I had one of these moments...

January 14th, 2013 - WRITE A SONG ABOUT WRITER'S BLOCK!  I'm not entirely positive if this is a scientific fact, but I feel the most creative in the morning.  Whether it be waking up in the middle of the night or rising at the butt-crack of dawn, I get a lot of melodies in my head around that time.   They could very well be melodies to a Wham! song, but is that necessarily a bad thing?  Wham! kinda rules.  On this particular morning, the melody and the lyrics came to me (which is a rarity).  On my way to work, I made sure to turn off the radio and listen to nothing but the sounds of my Ford Focus (plug).  As soon as I arrived to school, I rushed to my notebook and wrote these opening lines:

"I had a song in my head in the morning

But it was gone by the afternoon

I figure the older I get,

the more and more I forget

the melodies of a would-be tune."

And in the words of the great Coach Bobby Finstock, everything else was "cream cheese."  I couldn't think of any better way to start a song about writer's block then with those words.  Writing the rest of this song was much easier than expected.  Usually, I have a difficult time with the structure of a song (IE:  Where should the bridge be?  Should I repeat that line one more time?  Should I use the words "rage" and "machine" in the same sentence?)  Important stuff like that.  All this song needed was a chorus of EPIC sing-a-long proportions.

January 17th, 2013 - While refereeing middle school boys basketball, I couldn't stop humming the first verse to myself repeatedly.  That was a good thing.  The tricky part was sequencing the verse to a chorus that kicked things up a notch.  A hook that was universally catchy and thought-provoking.  You know, like this one...

Sorry, I couldn't help myself.  Montell Jordan has that kinda impact on me.  During my game(s), I couldn't stop singing "The Songwriter's Dead!  Yeah Yeah Yeah!"  Then, I thought, "That sucks.  Wouldn't it be more logical if you were trying to kill the songwriter since he can't write a song to save his own life?"  And boom went the dynamite...  "Kill the Songwriter" was born.  Yes, the title sounds like a Morrissey song, but the only difference is I won't cancel a show if a music venue served meat.  BRT (Boom Right There! ~Kyle J.)  Since it seems like everyone is starting a feud with Moz, I will stop there and say the song, "This Charming Man" is quite charming.  Aaaaaaaanyway, the result is definitely one of the catchiest choruses I have ever written:

"Hands in the air! (Kill the Songwriter, kill the songwriter)

Hands in the air!  (Kill the songwriter, kill the songwriter)

Countless days digging shallow graves with a pen stuck in my hand

Eyes on the clock 'till my writer's block is dead."

I conquered writer's block thanks to the help of my family, friends, and most importantly, the Whitman fans. I sincerely believe in you and I can't say "Thank You" enough for believing in me and the songs I've written so far. You ALL are an inspiration to me!  Before I go, I want to share my Top Ten Ways to Tell Writer's Block to Suck It or just ten ways to help defeat writer's block.  I hope it's helpful to any aspiring musician(s) having a difficult time writing tunes:

10.  Go Outside. (Seriously...stop watching Workaholics and go outside and play.)

9.  Put Down the Guitar.  (Trust me...it works.)

8.  Turn Off the Radio.  (Most of it sucks anyway.)

7.  Go Back Home.  (Visiting the town where you grew up in might help.)

6.  Read a Book.  (The latest issue of Paste Magazine doesn't count.)

5.  Take Long Car Rides.  (Make sure the stereo is OFF and you have plenty of snacks.)

4.  FAIL.  (Whether it be a goal you're trying to accomplish or a personality test, failing = success)

3.  Exercise.  (Walk, Run, watch Arnold's Pumping Iron, etc...)

2.  Hang Out with Friends and Family.  (Mexican food & beers.  That sounds good.)

1.  BELIEVE.  (If you believe in yourself, you are a force to be reckoned with!)

Your friend,

Ramalama

A Political Song for Kevin Arnold to Sing.

"If growing up is a tragedy, you're dying in a car crash on 83."

I grew up with two older brothers:  Ariel (center) and Omar (far left).  They are true inspirations in my life and also one of the main reasons why I continue to write music.  My real name is Hiram (pronounced Ee-dom in Espanol).  If you say it in English, it's pronounced "Hi Ram."  That's me on the far right by the way.  I think I still own that pair of Osh-Kosh overalls.  The backyard swing set, however, perished shortly after Hurricane Gilbert in 1988:(





The late-80's/early 90's are like hazy flashbacks.  I don't remember much about that time except my brothers' love/hate relationship for competitive sports and Van Halen.   However, if there are two things I DO remember most, it was:  1.)  Witnessing "crank calls" which involved them calling random people/neighborhood friends and playing parts of random heavy metal albums and then hanging up.  So juvenile, I know.  I'll never forget when they played clips from Anthrax's State of Euphoria on cassette to frighten some of their friends.  These kids would freak out on the telephone after hearing "Now it's Dark."  Truly inspiring.  Among Anthrax, these were some other records they would play:

 

...and of course 2.)  Watching Cinemax's Friday After Dark.  I could post a picture regarding this matter but I will choose to keep this PG-rated.

January 9th, 2013 - I had this melody in my head for several days but couldn't wrap my finger around what kind of lyrics to write. Family is all I could think of when I hummed it though. It felt very "homey" if that makes sense and I don't mean these kinda"homies:"

Then, I thought, why can't the first word of the song be your own name?  Hiram.  This is where the following opening verse came about...

"Hiram,

You were dreaming all your wonder years away

while your brothers stayed awake 'till Saturday

making prank phone calls and watching bad TV."

Bet you can't guess where I wrote it?  You guessed it, refereeing girl's basketball again.  Why not start the song like an open letter to your childhood-self from a 30-year old's perspective?  With that being said, the song ends up being a letter to Hiram about the triumphant highs and devastating lows of "growing up."  

Highway 83 is the expressway that runs through most of the Rio Grande Valley.  I wanted to include it somewhere in this new song just didn't know where.  One day in the early-90's, after Sunday mass, my family and I were involved in a non-serious car accident on our way to Luby's (Mac 'n' Cheese...mmmmm).  We were in my father's red Cutlass Supreme and I was in the backseat.  Thankfully, nobody was injured.  This event inspired the song's chorus: 

"If growing up is a tragedy, you're dying in a car crash on 83

where your one last memory is a lie.

Now, it's hard to say "goodbye" 

to the days when your mother sang you lullabies

Those days are over, time to walk away

from every yesterday."

~January 14th, 2013

Metaphors aside, that opening line is a homage to The Replacement's song, "Swingin' Party" off the album, Tim.  "If being afraid is a crime, we hang side-by-side," Paul Westerberg sings.  It's a line that leaves me speechless every time I hear it.  Whitman covered that song a handful of times years ago and I recall that line often caught someone's attention.  Whether it be a line cook on a smoke break at a bar & grill in Lafayette, LA or a teenager at a coffee shop in Fort Collins, CO, that line is as thought-provoking as it is ear-catching.  That's what I'm aiming for.  A song that every man and woman can relate to because we've ALL experienced the pitfalls of "growing up," and are still having a difficult time saying "goodbye."

 
~Hiramcito

Record Mime.

"I can't wait to come back home."

January 2nd, 2013 - I am not sure where it came from, but that sentence could not escape me.  It meant so much to me, and it made more sense than ever now.  I had my first melody in ages and most importantly, my first opening line to a song.  And it came to me while I was refereeing girl's basketball?  In all sincerity, a lot of my lyrics/melodies were created on the basketball court.  Just call me Dikembe Mutombo...wait, on second thought...

Finger waving-aside, I had something meaningful on my hands.  Now, all I had to do was build something around it.  Before writing a song, I always want to write about something I believe in.  Otherwise, it's not worth singing about.   When I hear a tune(s) like "I Wanna Be Your Dog" or "I Wanna Be Adored" or "I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend," I BELIEVE Iggy, Ian,and Joey (Sounds like a dysfunctional version of Full House except it'd probably be called Fun House) when they sing those songs.  That's what I want to feel.  That's what I want the listener to feel as well.  I had to go back... to 1995.

Yup.  That's me.  6th grade.  Alamo Middle School Cubs.  I wore my Dookie shirt that day because I knew it was picture day.  And at the end of every day, I couldn't wait to come back home.  Home to a cold can of Coca-Cola Classic, some nachos, Darkwing Duck on TV, and most importantly, my stereo.
Now, it was extremely important to me to get in "Ram, the Rock Star" time before mom or dad came home at 5:30p.  To be more specific, what that entailed was me standing in front of a mirror in my brother's room (because my room didn't have a mirror!), putting on my favorite music at the highest volume, and lip-syncing every word and pantomiming every strum of the guitar as if my life depended on it.  This was usually my favorite album to listen to when doing so...

If the cassette was stuck somewhere between "The World has Turned and Left Me Here" or "Buddy Holly," I had no choice but to rewind it and start with one of the greatest track one's of all-time, "My Name is Jonas."   The last minute of that song changed my life forever.  "I want to be a rock star when I grow up.  Either that or a Foo Fighter, because that sounds like a fun job." I would record mime the entire album from beginning to end.   Then, as fate would have it, during the climax of "Only in Dreams," my mom storms into my brother's bedroom when I'm mid-jam out w/ my left-handed air-guitar.  I sprint and hit the STOP button on the stereo.  "What in the world are you doing?" she asks.  "Practicing," I mutter.  As I perform the walk of shame, I ask "So what's for dinner?  Chicken?  Or chicken?"  Embarrassing.  Simply embarrassing.  But it's a moment that lives on and plays frequently in my memories.  That's what inspired these opening lines...

"I can't wait to come back home.

I have a Mexican Coke and a fist for a microphone

And if the telephone should ring,

I'll pretend to know how to sing, "Only in Dreams."

January 8th, 2013 - While on a long, long drive to Weimar, TX, I wrote those lyrics.  Of course, I didn't write them down in my notebook while driving.  That's just plain stupid.  Okay, okay, so I did.  I was really careful I swear.  I made sure to do it at red lights and in the Shell parking lot when I picked up some mediocre beef jerky in Flatonia.  Long story short (or longer), I had written the first verse of my first song in almost two years and it felt great to be back home.   

~Rammers

Give Me a Han.

"I am thinking about starting a blog."  Yes, I know I am 30-years old and I am fully aware I am late to the blog party but I think this...woah, Blog Party, that sounds like a name of a band or something...  Must be British.

Basically, this blog will serve as documentation for my songwriting in 2013.   My passion has always been performing.  Whether it be portraying The Dentist in a high school production of "Little Shop of Horrors," or jumping up and down like a Mexican kangaroo jacked up on 5-hour energy on stage with my band, Whitman, I'VE ALWAYS AND WILL ALWAYS LOVE TO PERFORM.  I write that in ALL CAPS because I swear by those words.

Over the course of the last year, nine months, two weeks, and four days or so, I had not written a single song.  After Whitman had released our Grammy-award winning album "Weekends" back in April of 2012,  I could not write a song to save a pussycat out of a three-foot tree.   I had hit the wall to end all walls.  I felt like this...

"The songs will come," my mother told me during the Christmas break after I had explained how frustrated I was because of the nearly two-year hiatus from writing.  I thought about those words every day leading up to the end of 2012.  My New Year's Resolution was to do one thing and one thing only.  Eat as many tacos as I possibly can in 2013.  I kid, I kid.  MY RESOLUTION WAS TO WRITE THE MOST SONGS I HAVE EVER WRITTEN IN A SINGLE YEAR.  

I couldn't force it though.   Work (Teaching Assistant/Basketball Referee-Extraordinaire) was starting up again.  The days were long and tiring.  If working with high school students with special needs doesn't wear you down, getting verbally abused by basketball moms will.  Then, during a Girl's Varsity game at V**********t High School, IT happened...

~Ram